"I am so mixed up as
to which Mass is valid, Latin vs. Novus Ordo. My wife wants the Novus Ordo, I
want Latin. It is causing some division."
Answer / Resources:
[click link(s) below, as applicable]
I'm sorry to hear that
the new rite (1960's Mass) has caused division between yourself and your wife. This is very
regrettable. As to which Mass is valid, they would both be valid if they are
done with the correct form, matter, intention. For more on what makes a
sacrament valid, please see
here. However, as one dear priest I know has said (paraphrasing here),
"being valid is the best thing I can say about the Novus Ordo." This is quite an
unfortunate situation. For more on the differences between the two rites, please
here. In regards to your dear wife, what is the reason she prefers the Novus
Ordo? Is she perhaps willing to be persuaded by facts about either the old or
the new Mass? For example, what about some of the points mentioned
here? Even if she is not willing to consider these issues, I would suggest
persevering prayer. As I have heard someone say, the desire for the Traditional
Mass is a grace that God sometimes gives over time. Perhaps God may be willing
to likewise grant your wife this grace sometime in the future. In the meantime,
practice kindness and patience. And should the situation warrant it, you might
consider some outside help (e.g. perhaps speaking with a good priest?). May God
grant you and your wife many blessings.
+ + +
"Among men there is no
love more ardent, no greater or more intimate tie, than that of those who are
united by marriage." (Catechism of the Council of Trent)
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